[Re-Play] Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

When not playing Mass Effect 3 (due to lack of an HDTV), I have been once again exploring the world of San Andreas on my MacBook. Admittedly, I am not a big computer gamer, so if it exists on a console, I’ll probably play it there first. What better way to become familiar with an unfamiliar medium than to play a game I already completed on console years ago. After a few minutes of configuring controls and learning how things worked with a keyboard and mouse, I quickly got my groove back and was able to start progressing through the pseudo-Golden State.

Just another day in the neighborhood | www.teamxbox.com

A shake of a spray can and the RockStar Games “R” logo appeared. This is the peak of open-world gaming in the GTA3 era. In control of Carl Johnson (CJ), the player is taken through a whole mess of events that keep the player on their toes and even managed to surprise me the second time around (like reading a good novel, I’ve forgotten some of the details). In fact, the sheer amount of “stuff” to do seems to be so overwhelming this time around. Aside from the main story (which includes everything from car jacking to shoot outs with rival gangs and a whole plethora of other less-than-legal activities), you can moonlight as a police officer, save some lives in the Ambulance, volunteer as a firefighter, or become a professional pimp. Aside from these odd jobs, you might even be interested in spending time shopping in downtown Los Santos, sightseeing in San Fierro, or gambling your savings away in Las Venturas. Whatever your interest, there is a lot to see and do in this huge, huge game.

gta.wikia.com

The Idea: Create three massive open-world sandbox urban environments based on Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Las Vegas and throw them all together. Fill in the in-between areas with rural country settings that help mix up game play and scenery. Add in the humor and delinquency that Grand Theft Auto titles are known for and you’ve got yourself a game. Sweeten the pot with the ability to swim (finally) and gang wars (which are really as fun as they sound).

Running after a car where the passenger is shooting at you? Good idea. | fileforum.betanews.com

The Look: The graphics don’t really redefine the word “amazing” but they are very good, especially given the time the game was released and the size of the world the player was exposed to. The level of customization in CJ was also extremely impressive given the size of the game (roughly 4 times larger than Vice City). While my CJ is pretty buff and likes to rock shades at all times of day, your CJ could be extremely overweight, wear only sweatshirts, and have a giant afro. Customization comes through the ability to change clothing, hair, tattoos, weight/muscle, and more, which gives players a ton of possibilities to play with.

The Sound: The soundtrack is awesome. Cruising around, watching the scenery while jamming to Ice Cube’s Today Was A Good Day is nothing short of amazing. Featuring over 11 radio stations with 20 DJs, there is certainly a lot to be heard. All of the voice acting was very convincing, as well. Gimme them duckets!

www.gtasanandreas.net

The Play: Controls are fairly smooth and represent the GTA universe well in this iteration. For some reason, a car turned completely on its side can be hit on the underbelly and completely turn right-side-up again (which let me complete the mission, so I’m not complaining), and of course running red lights and hitting pedestrians (note: not killing) don’t cause any police attention, but hey, that’s why we love GTA. As I noted previously, there is a crazy amount of things to see and do, and most of them work smoothly and without error. Only the lowrider mission (on the computer version) gave me any issue, as I didn’t know how to use the hydraulics at first.

The Entertainment: As I mentioned before, cruising… in a Banshee… listening to Ice Cube… Oh, but aside from that, the gang wars are still incredibly awesome. Once the missions become more complex and the “introductory” part of the game is over (for me, it felt like around the time AmmuNation’s started to become available), it becomes very, very fun. Having access to supplies and not depending on Emmett for a weapon (seriously, 16 shots in a pistol does not go far at all in Los Santos) makes for a much more enjoyable ride. And if you don’t like missions (or need a break) try the “spawn Rhino” cheat or the infinite bike jump cheat. Out running the military on 6 stars is also always a fun challenge.

Oh, ya know... just chillin' with my tank | lparchive.org

The Challenge: The game is fairly similar to what I remember. I don’t remember a lot of the details, though, so it makes the mission-to-mission story interesting and (seemingly) new. It’s hard doing some missions, though, knowing how things eventually play out… But as far as actual issues… Well, the obvious issue I have is that auto-targeting is somewhat different than I remember (if not altogether gone). Besides that, I don’t remember dying nearly as frequently in the PS2 version as I do in this one. And keep in mind; I suck less now than I did back in the day at video games, so… what’s the isssh-ya? These are minor complaints, all in all, though. I really think the game is going to get more and more challenging as I get out of Los Santos, but I’m up for it.

The Legacy: Introducing players to the first GTA game of this size was a major achievement for RockStar back in 2004.  This game is also extremely famous for causing some issues in the legal system regarding proper labeling – apparently there was an issue with some virtual nakedness and coffee!  This is also the first time we get to see San Andreas. For those of you who really enjoyed this game, get excited for a new interpretation of San Andreas later this year when Grand Theft Auto V is released!

static.guim.co.uk 

That about wraps it up. I’d love to stay and chat, but I’ve got territory to watch and a reputation to uphold in my community. Off to Los Santos! While I’m gone, what’s your favorite part of GTA: San Andreas? What do you think about the whole hot coffee scandal that happened back during the game’s initial release?

http://gtawallpaperswidescreen.blogspot.com

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[Gamer's Review] Indie Games: Journey

Journey's Title Screen | Thenerdpocalypse.com

Yesterday I went to GameStop to buy Journey, an Indie game developed by thatgamecompany.  It's a third-person game that I would best describe as a cooperative platformer.  I had first learned about Journey from Penny Arcade and was intrigued by the concept of the game.

Basically you're a robed figure (that looks kind of like a Garo Robe from Majora's Mask) on a journey across a vast desert to a large mountain.  You start this journey alone on the far side of a fairly large hill, and as you climb to the top of the hill and explore the ruins on the other side.  The controls are very simple, the left analogue stick makes you move, "Circle" lets you communicate and interact with the environment through what I can only describe as song.  "X" eventually allows you to jump and glide.  The camera can be manipulated with the right analogue stick or if you have the proper controller, simply by tilted or leaning the controller in one direction or another.

Your intrepid traveler. | MasonicGamer.com

The developers of the game really don't hold your hand much throughout the game, instead forcing you to use things like observation skills and common sense in order to figure out what you're supposed to do.  The only real "tutorials" were when I learned that "Circle" lets me communicate with others and "X" lets me jump and glide.  Everything else you have to learn either through watching the cut scenes or by observing your traveling companion.

Speaking of your companion, you're not alone in your travels across the scorching desert.  Shortly after learning the controls (all three of them), you run into your companion for the rest of the game.  Or at least I did, I have yet to do a second play-through of the game to be absolutely sure.  You aren't told your companion's name and you can't use a headset to talk to him or her.  Rather, you're forced to rely on pantomiming your actions and using "Circle" to get his or her attention so they watch you do something.  It takes some getting used to, but my companion and I figured out how to work with each other shortly after solving the first puzzle.

As it turns out, we were both fluent in "hieroglyph." | Stevivor.com

I did learn at the very end that it is possible to write short messages in the ground, which usually leaves footprints behind for a couple of seconds.  I wrote out "Hello" in barely legible cursive for my companion last night, but I don't think he noticed.  Next time I hope to discuss the socioeconomic status of Poland with a complete stranger.

The game does offer a single player experience, or at the very least you can play without an Internet connection.  I'm not sure how that would work, as there were several times that without my traveling buddy I would have been completely screwed.  You see, there are some puzzles that are easier to solve with two people, and by "singing" you can recharge the runes on your companion's scarf, allowing them to continue jumping and gliding.  Without such a companion, you'd be forced to rely on the environment to recharge the runes, which while possible, would certainly make things more difficult for you.

As you can probably tell from the images throughout this article, the visuals on this game are simplistic, yet I found them to be stunning.  Maybe I'm just an artsy kind of guy (I'm not), but I found myself enthralled by the Wind Waker-esque graphics style (what is that, two Zelda references in this article?).  In a way, the graphics style reminded me of some of the paintings I've seen from the three museum trips I've made during my twenty-year-long life.  I may have visited one of those museums twice.

The game's soundtrack, which seamlessly switches between calming and almost Zen-like to tension-filled and "Oh shit don't let those flying robot snakes find you!", was composed by Austin Wintory, who has composed soundtracks for several Sundance Films and video games, including fl0w, also by thatgamecompany.  The music remains subtle throughout the game, but without it I firmly believe that Journey wouldn't have been nearly as good as it is.

"Are we there yet?" | Thatgamecompany.com

I realize that I've been gushing over this game for the past 641 words (don't believe me?  Count 'em up, I'll wait.), so I'll dive into the critiques and criticisms portion of this article.  The only real beef I have with Journey is the fact that it's so short.  The game only took me two hours or so to complete.  The game play and my overwhelming desire to get to the top of the mountain made that time fly by, so it seemed ever shorter to me.  However, I don't think that the developers could add anything to Journey that wouldn't ruin the game, so it would be best for everyone if they ignored that complaint.

While I understand Journey's an indie game and therefore has a smaller budget at their disposal, it would have been nice if I could have done a little character customization.  Even changing my brown cloak into a nice red would have been enough for me.  It is possible that such a thing would ruin the experience of the game, since it's supposed to be about two strangers helping one another on their mutual quest, but it'd still be nice.

"You go first."  "No man, you go first." | Gamecatalyst.com

 Journey is not a game for everyone.  If all you look for in a video game is awesome graphics, intense game play, and lots of sex and violence, there are other games to spend your money on.  If you like cooperative game play and puzzle solving (something I never thought I'd like), then look in between your couch cushions for $15 in change, because that's all that Journey will cost you.

All in all, I loved this game.  If I had to assign an arbitrary number to Journey (say, between 1 and 10), I'd give it a 9.  If you have $15 and two hours of free time, I definitely recommend that you give Journey a chance.

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[Top 5] Games Based On TV Shows (and How I'd Do It)

So in my ever-evolving quest to involve my girlfriend in my gaming hobby, I recently picked up Lost: Via Domus for Xbox 360. She watched the show back when it first aired and I just recently finished watching all of the seasons, so I figured it’d be a good game for us to try together. For a casual night of gaming, it wasn’t bad. She got to enjoy her favorite show from a new point of view and I got a topic for a blog article.

For those of you who haven’t seen Lost, you should probably get on that because it’s quite possibly one of the greatest shows of all time. Yes, of all time.

But that’s another topic, entirely. As I watch her play through the game, which admittedly has its flaws (GameSpot really echoes my feelings on the game in their review), I come to the realization that many TV show offer a good amount of IP that could be transformed into great games if put into the right hands.

Below is a list of the top 5 TV show IP that should be made into video games and my recommendations for how it should be done. (Note: most of these are already being made/have already been made, but the descriptions provided are purely my suggestion of how I would’ve done it. Additionally, I've played none of the games with the exception of the Lost-based game.)

5. The Walking Dead

Originally adapted from a comic book of the same name by Frank Darabont, the Walking Dead serves as perfect source material for a video game. While I haven’t personally seen the show yet (I know, I know, I’ll get on it) the iTunes store offers this synopsis: “After waking from a coma in an abandoned hospital, police officer Rick Grimes finds the world he knew gone - ravaged by a zombie epidemic of apocalyptic proportions. Nearby, on the outskirts of Atlanta, a small encampment struggles to survive as 'the dead' stalk them at every turn. Can Rick and the others hold onto their humanity as they fight to live in this terrifying new world? And, amidst dire conditions and personal rivalries, will they ultimately survive one another?” Now doesn’t that sound ridiculously like a video game set up? The only possible criticism I can see for not making this show into a game is the sheer amount of zombie-based games that are already on the market. Do we really need another Resident Evil- or Fallout 3-esque experience?

What a lovely smile you have! | blogs.amctv.com

Short answer: Yes. Longer answer: Yes, if it’s done right. I imagine this game being a non-linear sandbox adventure with exploration and progression similar to Grand Theft Auto games, where completing missions unlocks more of the map, but in general you can do whatever you please. Missions could be presented in a variety of  ways, preferably with cut scenes setting up each mission to explain the objective and the narrative significance (similar to Prototype) or could be obtained simply from overhearing others or from short conversations with NPCs (like some of the fetch quests in Mass Effect 3 or quests in Fallout 3). The game’s play style would likely be third-person over-the-shoulder shooter or a standard FPS with some light platforming elements. Either way, the setting would provide a lot of different options to game developers.

The first episode of The Walking Dead video game is scheduled to come out April 25^th, 2012. Let’s hope they did a good job with it.

4. Game of Thrones

This seems to be another no-brainer. Fresh in the beginning of its second season on HBO, Game of Thrones is based on a series of novels by George R.R. Martin titled A Song of Ice and Fire. Following the stories of several houses (families), Game of Thrones is a sort of medieval fantasy that offers a massive amount of video game material. Small-scale governmental drama between factions, large-scale war, political intrigue, wolves, dragon eggs, melted gold, beheadings, and a small-statured nobleman who is absolutely hilarious all add up to quite an amazing adventure waiting to be had.

Tyrion Lannister | fanpop.com

As far as a game adaption is concerned, the IP could easily be turned into a Real-Time Strategy (RTS), but where would the inventiveness be? Instead, what if it was an amalgamation of gaming styles? I’m thinking Civilization V RTS for large-scale war mixed with segments of exploration similar to Skyrim or Dragon Age: Origins. Combat in those segments could easily be Final Fantasy X turn-based fights (which gives the gamer a break from fast-paced strategy) or, alternatively, could be set up with an Active-Time Battle gauge system (similar to Final Fantasy VII). Add in a dash of Mass Effect style story telling with dialogue options that can actually sway the outcome of the game (or at the very least the journey you take to reach the end) and you’ve got yourself quite an epic tale.

Game of Thrones is expected to release for Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, and PC in 2012. It is expected to be a role-playing game. Let us hope it does the novels and the TV series justice.

3. House M.D.

House chronicles the work of Dr. Gregory House, an expert in diagnostic medicine, whose famed expertise is only rival by his infamous bad attitude. Lacking any bedside manner, House would rather pop pills than interact with his patients. With a team of doctors at his side, House sets off to cure the wide variety of illnesses afflicting patients in his hospital.

beyondhollywood.com

While this may seem a bit boring for a video game concept, it could nonetheless be utilized in training for medical students. Granted, the majority of cases are not rare forms of malaria or Lupus, it would nonetheless serve an interesting backdrop to relay potentially boring information. Textbooks are the tried and true method of study for most disciplines, but imagine if technology could be utilized to parlay that same information in a more creative, interesting way. Alternatively, the game could be simply a cinematic experience, giving the player the option to watch the story unfold based on their choices. In fact, why not do a Dr. Mario game utilizing the House IP. Creating a “easy to learn, difficult to master” puzzler with some narrative every few matches could be a great way to revitalize a somewhat ignored genre.

There is currently a House video game for the Nintendo DS, which had lackluster reviews and reception.

2. Dexter

If you hadn’t noticed, gaming has become more and more story driven in recent times. Games like Super Mario World are now being replaced with story heavy games like the Final Fantasy series or, to an even greater extreme, games focused almost entirely on the narrative such as Heavy Rain. Dexter focuses around a protagonist of the same name who is a blood spatter pattern police officer by day and a serial killer, punishing any criminals who he believes the justice system wouldn’t, by night. Not only has the show been on for 6 years and garnered a massive following; there is also a substantial amount of material in the show that could be adapted into a video game.

cdn.screenrant.com

Imagine: You play as Dexter. During the day, you solve puzzles revolving around blood spatter patterns during the day, which eventually lead you and your comrades to the perp. You are now heavily engrossed in a mysterious game full of dialogue and narrative options. If you manage to choose the right kinds of interrogation questions and/or find the right kinds of evidence, you may be able to put the criminal behind bars. Some of the criminals are more careful, however. Because of their attention to detail and knowledge of the legal system, they manage to escape justice. The moon rises as the second half of that particular chapter unfolds and you are now in an action game, based heavily on stealth, like Tom Clancy’s Splinter Cell, except with automatic weapons and more surgical tools. Alternatively, the game could play out entirely different, showing the day-to-day adventures as cut scenes and focusing heavily on Dexter’s nighttime activities… There are a lot of possibilities.

While a fully realized game has yet to surface, for the time being we can enjoy a Dexter video game on the iPhone.

1.  Lost

Now you might be asking yourself, “Dave, didn’t they come out with a Lost game? In fact, didn’t it inspire you to write this article?” Yes. Yes, it did. The game failed to do justice to the series as a whole, however. Lost centers around survivers of a plane crash on a deserted island. Each season focuses on a new overarching storyline, most of which center around the character development of the story’s main 15+ characters.

vinegeek.com

If I were to make Lost a video game, I would’ve focused more heavily on the character development side of things, like the show did. In fact, I don’t see any reason why a MMORPG couldn’t be made using this IP. Consider utilizing the existing platform where each server is its own island. Like World of Warcraft, you could choose a faction: the Survivors or the Others, and would gain benefits based on which side you chose. You could determine your background (soldier like Sayid, medic like Jack, Swindler like Sawyer, etc.), which would be the equivalent of a class.

Once in game, you complete missions that range from fetch quests (need more wood for the fire) to recon missions (investigate the other faction). Exploration would be a fundamental part of the game as well. In fact, maybe when you hit a certain level you can receive a mount (I’m talking baby blue Volkswagon Hippie Van!) Combat would be handled primarily with simple firearms and hand-to-hand combat with the inhabitants of the island (Polar Bears, sharks, wildlife, or the Black Smoke). Conversations would flow fluidly and naturally and would serve a greater purpose than to be time consuming and extend play. Implementing a loyalty system (similar to that of Dragon Age: Origins) would help immensely in determining your standing with the other factions.

It’s not a perfect idea and there are a lot of unanswered questions, but it certainly has the backbone for a really interesting release.

Well there you have it! Some games that were already created based on TV IP that could be made even better. What are your thoughts? Drop some comments and let your voice be heard!

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[Top 5] Games That Deserve Sequels and/or Remakes

Sorry for being about two weeks late with this latest Friday update.  I've had a lot on my plate in college land.  Hopefully this little article will appease you and get rid of any hard feelings.  No?  Oh well, I'll post it anyway.

Normally sequels and remakes are an atrocity and the people behind them deserve to be drug out into the street and shot.  Sequels suck and are made to cash in on a previous success without requiring much thought or effort.  The only constant exceptions are planned sequels, trilogies, and series.

On the same note, most remakes are just “get rich quick” schemes that take classic games, update the graphics, maybe throw in some extra features like expanded multiplayer, an extra weapon, new costumes, or a super cool and horribly overpowered weapon.

However, there are some games that truly deserve a sequel or a remake, and I plan on bringing some of those games to light.  If you disagree with me then go ahead and let me know in the comments section.  If it turns out that such a game has already been made, also inform me of this so I can go out and buy it.

5. Comix Zone

Comics, action, sunglasses, and ponytails.  Comix Zone is truly a representative of the '90s.

Comix Zone is an older game from 90s that proves that you don't need a sensible or plausible story line in order to make sense.  In fact, most games seem to follow that line of thought, so maybe it's better if you just ignore what I wrote.

I don't remember much of Comix Zone, aside from the fact that I was a kick-ass comic book artist that was dragged into a comic by its main villain.  Once inside, I proceeded to kick ass and take names until I got to this one pit I could never get across.  Ever.

Seriously, I spent about 80% of the time playing that game at the freaking pit where I would constantly die because I couldn't jump far enough.  I don't even think I managed to make it out of the first Episode, that's how hard the game was, or how bad I was.  Given that I was only 7 or 8 when I played Comix Zone, it wouldn't surprise me if I was just bad at video games.

Sega, or whoever controls this game now, please revisit this gem.  I know that it can be downloaded on Steam, but you can do better.  Toss in some more episodes or extra endings or improve the game play through more combos (although that might bring it too far into the fighting genre).

Or maybe release Comix Zone 2 where Sketch has to go back into his comics for some reason and kick the ass of an ever stronger villain than Mortus.  You know what?  A sequel sounds a lot better than a remake.  Make a sequel!

4. Gauntlet

From the Golden Age of gaming where you still had to go outside to play.

When I heard that "Gauntlet" was going to be released for the Nintendo DS I just about shit myself in sheer joy.  I'd be able to play one of the classic dungeon crawl games with friends (because when I little I didn't have friends, clearly) and better graphics.

Then Eidos Studios delayed the game's release.  Then they delayed it again.  Now, four years after its "initial release," Gauntlet DS hasn't hit the shelves and in all likelihood has been cancelled.  My hopes and dreams were crushed, and I would never be able to play Gauntlet with my friends.

Me when I'm old and still haven't played Gauntlet with my friends.

Eidos Studios or Backbone or whoever owns the rights to the game, just release it already.  Everything I read made it sound like you almost finished the game anyway.  If you don't feel like doing that, then hopefully someone else will.

All I really want is some classic hack'n'slash dungeon crawling game that I can play with 1-4 people on a Friday night when all of the cool kids are out drinking and talking to the ladies, is that too much?  I'll even take the smart-ass narrator that loves to remind me over and over again that "The wizard needs food badly!"

I AM AWARE THAT I'M HUNGRY, THANK YOU!

3. Final Fantasy Tactics Advance and Final Fantasy Tactics Advance 2: Grimoire of the Rift

Dear Square Enix, please give me the hundreds of hours I spent playing your games back.

The Final Fantasy Tactics Advance series did two good things for me: introduced me to small-army tactics games (as opposed to Advanced Wars, which is all about amassing a relatively large force), and get me into the Final Fantasy series (although the only other Final Fantasy game I ended up playing was FF3).

The games were beautifully designed, the combat was solid, and the storylines were pretty good.  As a brief recap, in FFTA you were Marche, a kid growing up in the town of St. Ivalice that suddenly found himself in the magical kingdom of Ivalice.  Marche’s goal is to return home with his friends and younger brother, most of whom do not wish to return to their hum drum lives (would you?).  Eventually he convinces everyone that living in Ivalice is a form of escapism and that it’s not healthy to run away from your problems all the time.  End Story, roll credits, applause.  Was Marche the hero, or was he a villain?  FFTA left quite a few unanswered questions.

FFTA2 has a much more upbeat storyline and a happier character: Luso Clemens.  Luso also lives in St. Ivalice with his worrisome aunt.  One day after school, Luso has to serve detention by cleaning up the library.  He finds an old book and is transported to Ivalice (apparently the real one this time).  Unlike Marche, Luso has no intentions of returning home, he’s going to explore and generally have a good time.  However, as fate would have it, Luso needs to step up to the plate and prevent the big bad evil lady Illua from destroying or rewriting the world in her own image (it’s been awhile, okay?).  In the end Luso succeeds, we end the story, roll the credits, and applaud.

Now to the main part of this entry: I want to see Final Fantasy Tactics Advance 3.  The Nintendo 3DS came out not too long ago, so the fine people at Square Enix should be falling all over themselves at the chance to call it Final Fantasy Tactics Advance 3DS: Talisman of the Ancients or something like that.

However, I don’t want the same old “boy finds book, boy is transported to Ivalice” story.  I want a girl to find the book (it’s 2012, we can have female protagonists now), but I want the main character to be a native of Ivalice, not someone from our world.  Make the story about him trying to help the girl, who’s scared and alone in this world, get back home.

Basically, I want this.

2. EA Games’ The Lord of the Ring Trilogy

The Lord of the Rings is probably the best-known modern fantasy series out there.  No, forget I said that.  It is the best known modern fantasy series out there.  Without J.R.R. Tolkien’s works, we wouldn’t have modern fantasy.  There would be no Dungeons and Dragons, which in turn means that the fantasy video games based off of D&D (note: all of them) wouldn’t exist.  Tolkien made it possible to like elves, dwarves, dragons, and hobbits.  Then almost 50 years later Peter Jackson came along and made it cool to like elves, dwarves, dragons, and hobbits!

EA Games took The Lord of the Rings movie trilogy and turned them into three fairly successful games that I quite enjoyed.  It doesn’t get much better than being an elf archer bringing down mumakil and trolls with well-placed arrows (or more accurately a barrage of well-placed arrows) or taking on a small army of orcs and Uruk-Hai as Samwise the Brave.

Samwise Gamgee.  Best hobbit, or best hobbit?

Not to mention that the games looked awesome when they were released (which was back when the GameCube, Playstation 2, and original Xbox were the consoles to have).  Compared to today, they look like crap and they don’t offer nearly enough game play.  Today’s gamers are used to have hundreds of hours of game play in a single game, something that the three LotR games together can’t offer without replaying levels several times.

I’m thinking that EA Games should get together and have another look at their video game trilogy.  Update the graphics, add a little more to the combat to make it more cinematic (even if it’s just the “kill cams” that have become so popular lately), make each of the levels bigger in terms of space and game play, and make the leveling system feel more complete.  Maybe “borrow” some things from Skyrim, making various perks and abilities available to the different characters rather than simply having the players buy the same set of combos and health upgrades over and over again for different characters.  And let us play with our friends either online or in the same room.  Or both.  Yeah, make it both.

Oh, and definitely let us play as the entire Fellowship without having to unlock characters just to play them on already completed levels.  Aragorn was playable in each of the games, but I wasn’t able to play as Merry or Pippin until I had already thrown Gollum into the fires of Mt. Doom.  I want to be able to play as Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Gandalf, Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli, and Boromir (and I suppose Faramir for when Boromir kicks it) without having to jump through hoops!  Am I acting like an entitled gamer?  Maybe a little, but these are main characters!  I’d gladly have to unlock some characters, but make it secondary characters like Eowyn, Arwen, and Haldir (and I guess Boromir after he dies).

EA Games, I beseech you.  Take your LotR game trilogy and turn it into one super game that tells the entire story of The Lord of the Rings from the Shire all the way to Mt. Doom.  Give me the games I loved with improved graphics, more levels, and overall better game play!  Please?

1. The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask

If the Skull Kid's creepy laugh didn't immediately play in your head, you need to turn you N64 back on a play some more.

The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask is my all-time favorite Zelda game.  I’m not entirely sure why, but I found the idea of running around wearing magical masks as a 10 or 11 year old kid endearing.  Maybe it’s because the masks I ran around wearing at those ages were boring pieces of cardboard and plastic that were no more magical than my toenail clippings.

I Googled “Magical Toes” and got this.  No, I don’t understand the connection either…

 In fact, I love this game so much that I want to get a permanent tattoo on my body (which is a temple, mind you), from this game.  And not the typical Triforce tattoo that most Zelda nerds get.  No, I’m talking about Darmani’s tattoo.

What?? It means "loyalty" and "brotherhood" to me.  And also that I'm a giant nerd.

 So yeah, there’s that.  Anyway, Nintendo recently released The Ocarina of Time for the 3DS, and while I haven’t played it, it looks stunning for a handheld game.  I’m not entirely sure what they changed and what stayed the same aside from the graphics and some game controls that were altered to fit the 3DS platform.  However, I trust that Nintendo hasn’t killed Ocarina with its remake.

Nintendo, if you remake Majora’s Mask for the 3DS, I will buy your newest handheld just so I can play that game.  If you aren’t aware, Nintendo, I haven’t purchased anything from you console-wise since my Nintendo DS Lite I got about four or five years ago.  The last game I bought was probably the Fire Emblem remake, which is sitting in my dresser while I play and replay Advanced Wars DS and Mario Kart DS.

Suffice to say, Nintendo, getting me to buy something from you would be a pretty big deal for me.  Not because I haven’t wanted to (believe me, not owning Skyward Sword hurts my soul), but because there are other things I have to buy first.  Like food.

Unlike some of the other games, I have no requests as to what you do with Majora's Mask save two, Nintendo.  One: remake it for the 3DS, and two: don't completely fuck it up.

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